un poco de alivio

It could have been the entire bottle, but I stopped myself at a glass. I slept well and was up at 5, got my workout in and even though C was up and about by 5:45 I feel much better. Perhaps it is the fact that I know I will be leaving the house today to go to work (hark...do I hear...Adult Time?!...so this is why I teach university and not children) that makes things magically better on Tuesdays and Thursdays, even when they are not in reality any different than yesterday.

I had to cancel out of swimming lessons today.. K's cough is just not getting better and I would much rather her be able to go to school than for her to get worse due to having gone swimming today.

sigh. I would just love to be able to take a nap.

drivin' mama to drink?

He screamed all day.

I know he is tired, but he won't take a nap.

I got 4 hours of sleep last night so I am at my wits' end, too.

When is bedtime?

Where's the wine?

3 a.m. wake-up call

I think today the "to coffee or not to coffee" debate will be settled.

As I sit here at the computer squinting at the screen due to its brightness on my sensitive eyes this morning, I am reminded yet again that I have been up and about this morning since 3 a.m., as K is finishing up a little cold and todavía sufre de tos. Tenía que buscar la medicina...but she had to fight me on that, asking a million questions about how it would taste. It is homeopathic, honey-based. It tastes like honey. Of course, she would not believe me until I had already spilled 1/2 teaspoon all over the place trying to get her to taste it.

So by 4:30 I gave up my quest to conciliar el sueño, got dressed and went downstairs to get my workout in. 10 minutes into the workout, I hear pitter-patter upstairs, then "WAAAAAH" (my other pseudonym, remember?) so that was cut short. In fact, it is now 6:30--I had to stay laying with C all this time to get him to go back down to sleep. Mornings like this make me feel completely robbed. I go out of my way and sacrifice sleep just to get 1/2 hour of a workout in the mornings, and when even that is taken away from me, it really does not set the greatest mood for the day.

As MQE says, however, this stage will not last forever. And as I look down at C, his head lodged into the crook of my neck to cuddle with me, I know this and realize there will be a time in the not-so-distant future that I will long for this closeness.

no new housewives

My children are asleep, I have an hour to watch My Favorite Show on TV without any interruption...and it is a REPEAT.

Is this just the story of my Life or what?

I guess it is a good thing I have a plethora of other things to do...not that I am doing them now.

Last night S and I got to go out for a girl's night out. I had thought about a sweater I wanted, so we went back to Nordstrom and I tried it on along with a few others for color/size/opinion, and ended up walking out with exactly what I had tried on a week ago. Why I can't just buy myself something when I first see it, I don't understand; it has something to do with sacrifice (?! don't ask...) and never buying anything for myself. It would save me a lot of gas, in the long run, if I just purchased when I see what it is I want...as that happens so rarely anyway. Then we went to the other end of the mall and had dinner at the bar of TGI Friday's. I felt like the oldest one there; indeed, upon ordering my single glass of Merlot, I was not carded. Life certainly has changed. It wasn't even 10:00 by the time I returned home; there are no such things as late nights now that I'm up at 5 a.m. anymore. We enjoyed a wonderful night, though, which is always necessary for reminding myself of the existence of my alter-ego (insert real name here) that has been replaced in recent years by Mommy (aka Momma, Honey, WAAAAH, and the like).

And I must wait two more weeks for a new episode of Housewives. So much for perspective.

Where were you when...

20 years ago today the Space Shuttle Challenger disintegrated shortly after take-off.

I was in the 8th grade. My father taught math at the same junior high school I attended and all my peers came to me saying that he had cried upon hearing the news. My family had joked about submitting his name for the Teacher in Space program. One teacher from our school district, under whom I would later teach, made the Final 7 cut with Christa McAullife. Obviously not chosen, I remember the local news stations interviewing him that night and he was visibly shaken and greatly saddened, as he had been through various trainings with Ms. McAullife and had come to know her.

There is a nice memorial to those astronauts at Arlington National Cemetary, up in the same general area as the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.

Up until this explosion, I was always up early for all Space Shuttle launches, excitedly watching them take off as a young girl, dreaming of what that experience must be like. Following that launch, and to this day, I have yet to see a take-off. However, I do remember holding my breath as the last Shuttle re-entered Earth's atmosphere, upon remembering the disintegration of Columbia at re-entry.

In my life, this was the first nation-unifying, national mourning tragedy I had experienced.

promising?

I had a wonderful experience talking to a doctor's office yesterday on the telephone. That alone, I could write in the record books.

This office was highly recommended to me by the midwife through whom I had my son, and is in the field of Integrated Medicine, a holistic approach to lifestyle wellness, not simply the temporary treatment symptoms of whatever might be wrong. My chiropractor had recommended somebody to me as well, but after a series of telephone-tag and messages reflecting vocal tones bordering impatience, I really started to feel uncomfortable, as I do not wish to enter into a wellness relationship with somebody who causes me to feel stress. That, to me, seems counterproductive to what would be our common goal. Some personalities just don't jive.

So I was speaking to the receptionist who actually listened to me and, as I was calling for one doctor in the practice, she said that, hearing what I have to address, I would perhaps be better matched up with another woman, a bit closer to my own age, and would be able to get me in by next Wednesday.

I am hoping that this will be the beginning of discovery in how to live healthier and to guide my family along the same path, while also perhaps answering some questions and alleviating some of my fears.

to coffee or not to coffee...

...that IS the question as of late.

I don't want to get hooked on the caffeine, and for years have been proud of the fact that I just DON'T NEED IT. My high energy level, partnered with the fact that I am naturally a morning person has always worked to my benefit.

Then I had children.

Now I find, as I awake at 5 a.m. each and every morning to have a little "alone" time B.C. (Before Children) that by about 11 in the morning or so I could take a nap...and by 3 or 4 in the afternoon I am so ready to crash that I can hardly keep my head above the proverbial water. This is not good, since two afternoons a week now through May I teach from 4-7 at night! Somehow I don't seem to have a problem at work, but I fear for my students should I start caffeinating myself. I know that my rate of speaking greatly increases in speed with caffeine, and that is the last thing my Spanish students need from me (ja ja ja).

Can you believe, I am actually pondering a vice? That is to say, besides wine...but I don't drink hardly enough wine to call it a vice. That is a pure luxury once in a while...or I suppose, becoming more and more medicinal in purpose, however I care to see it by the weeks' end when I might be able to actually enjoy a glass of Rioja.

So...will I be spending some buckies at Buckies today? We shall see...