peace

Yesterday was not a peaceful day in K's little-but yet, so big-heart.

It seemed that she and her brother were constantly at each other, there were so many tears spilled over trivial items and I spent much of the little "free" time I had yesterday holding her and letting her cry on my lap.

At Mass last night, when it came time to deliver the sign of peace to our neighbors, I believe she wanted to shake the hand of the lady behind us, but A seemed to not see her for some reason (which, as a sidebar, is unusual) and this sent K off into a crying fit of emotion--so I scooped her up into my arms and carried her out into the narthex where we sat on the floor and I just let her sob and tell me what had happened.

I told her that I cry often during the sign of peace time at Church, too. It can be hard to give peace when I don't feel peaceful inside. Then a little boy, younger than K, came over and, having heard what she said about nobody wanting to shake her hand, offered to her his hand to shake. She did accept, and that warmed my heart.

K is an incredibly sensitive soul, much like myself. However, even if not malintentioned (is that a word?), if one's actions do not correspond necessarily to my expectations, this can set me off into an emotionally destructive tailspin--and I see the same occurring with my daughter. I have always believe myself to be blessed to be such an emotionally sensitive person. I think that made me a very good musician when I was growing up--or perhaps, musicianship provided me with that emotional outlet that I required. I love seeing that emotional and empathetic side of my daughter develop--but I need to take care to help to channel her emotions so they may be productive and not destructive to character.